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stupidfool
so i went home. the graduation party was fun; the graduation ceremony was boring and i had to wear my hair down and my grandfather told me to stop wiggling about every 5 minutes.

everything was hectic and chaotic, as i had predicted. i was home less than 24 hours, but fly has now offically graduated, and i witnessed it.

i came back and went straight to bed without studying. i woke up in time to print out the stuff i needed to study, and go to work with molly. when we came in, terrie talked to us, and showed us pictures of things she had painted. we talked about who was running self-check, and when i asked if could, she said, 'i thought you didn't like self-check,' (not in a mean or accusing tone) so i explained that i just needed to study. she said she'd let me, and she did. it wasn't enough. the store was packed and everybody needed help and i didn't even get through 1/4 of the stuff i needed to get through. when i got home, i went to bed instead of studying.

i got up and studied for about 10 minutes before i went to take the first final. i probably did fairly well, but i probably didn't get an a in the class, and i needed one because this was supposed to be my easiest class.

i came home and studied for an hour and then took another final. i probably did ok, and i probably didn't get an a in that class either.

i came home, got changed, and went to work. marie was there, and she was all grumpy to everybody. our shifts only overlapped for an hour, and nickolas came up front and asked me to go find some 16 oz american iws because he couldn't find any, so i did. i was probably crawling around the big wall of cheese when marie left. it would be almost tolerable, except for that i won't see her again for over a week. she works tuesday and i don't. then she's off until sunday, and sunday, i go home, and i won't be back until friday. that's a long time to go without touching marie...

terrie asked about my finals. she was friendly. i told her about them, and she actually listened to my answer and responded to it, and i responded to her response... it's called a conversation, and having one with terrie is quite a rarity.

jim came in. terrie, the new kelly, and jane were in the office, and i was standing in the low doorway. (random thought: that's probably not what i mean to call that, is it? it's not like it has an actual name... nobody ever says, 'meet me in the low doorway.' i just needed something to call it, but that's not what i should have picked. the door is low. there isn't really a doorway. a low doorway would be something that you could hit your head on, wouldn't it be? what i mean is that i'm standing in the doorway that holds the low door. i wind up talking about leaning on the low doorway and climbing on the low doorway, and i really mean to say low door.) anyway, jim comes in and i exclaim 'look!' and i call his full name, and terrie laughs. then she tells jim to give her a hug and comes over to the low door and so does he. he says, on his way over, 'group hug!' this means me, because i'm standing in the low doorway, which is where they're both heading. i get scared. he hugs me with one arm and terrie with the other and terrie hugs him back, which causes her arm to brush against mine. i used to hate touching people. i used to hate hugs. i don't think i ever got over that... i think i just found a few exceptions. jim is not one of them. neither, to my surprise, is terrie. it's not that i mind touching either of them, like it's gross, just that it's uncomfortable. i feel weird. i want to get away. he lets go and i escape to self-check.

molly runs me a break on self-check, and i just stay up there for my break, and we talk to jim. he is fine. he is friendly and he is good old jim. i miss working with him and seeing him regularly...

matt didn't leave. he's not the boss any more, but he wound up going nowhere. i get to stay and do the baking aisle for a while after my shift is scheduled to end. molly started later, so she gets to stay an hour more. i go up to the break room and sit down to wait for her. i listen to maxwell and study. for real. for an hour, i study. here, i can't study. there, i can. i'm seriously considering going back there tomorrow night, after i get off work at udf, just so i can study, becuase i know i won't be able to do it here. it's my hardest final and my grade is awful. i seriously run the risk of not passing this class if i don't do well on the final... i need to study. but not now... now i need to sleep.

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