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stupidfool
i got a car. it's brand new, and reasonably priced. it won't come in until after i'm back at school, and i don't have a place to park it until fall quarter anyway. but come september, i will have a car to drive. no more smelly busses. no more borrowing molly's car. no more begging for rides. i will have my very own car (cd player and air conditioning included :-)

i was watching er with my dad (on tape) and it was the episode where sandy lopez kisses kerry weaver. in the same episode, there's a gay guy and his friend, who is on the dl. at the commercial break, my dad complained about how nowadays, half of that show is about gay people. i said casually, 'probably more like a fourth.' he said whatever, he thinks they're overrepresented. i'm such a fucking chicken. i could have said something... i want to tell them. i want to tell molly. i want to tell marie. i want to tell amit and rashid, just because i'm 99% sure they already know, and they seem to spend half their spare time trying to get me to just say it... but i won't. i'm fucking stupid.

tomorrow, i think i'm supposed to do something with jamie, which should be fun. even better is that after deciding that, i called brandy, to see when she could hang out. she said tuesday afternoon (i told i was busy) so she said well, wednesday afternoon, she was probably going to get together with holly, so we could just all 3 hang out. yeeeeeeeeeah! i get to see holly! but i'm not getting my hopes up... (well, i am. i'm stupid like that. but i'm trying very hard not to, because not getting to see holly is going to be a huge disappointment as it is...) i LOVE that girl... she's second only to christine...

i miss marie. it's a strange kind of miss, not like how i miss christine... it hurts, still. just differently. it's a frustrating kind of miss. marie is a frustrating kind of person. she's probably asleep with her boyfriend as i write this. or maybe they're still having sex to make up for all the time they spent apart. it's fucking frustrating. i want her. i want her to want me. fuck...

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CONGRATS on the Car

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