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my babies
stupidfool
generally speaking, when you want somebody you can't have, do you think it's best to tell them, or to keep it to yourself? and why?

does your answer change based on:
- the way in which you want them? (i.e. love, lust, silly crush)
- the reason you can't have them? (i.e. they're in a new relationship, they're in a committed relationship, they're married, they're of the opposite sexuality, they're just not that into you, you're in a relationship)
- who they are to you? (i.e. a good friend you've developed feelings for, a co-worker you'll have to see every day until you retire, a friend of a friend you could either be-friend or never see again)

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Fantasies give me a special joy. Now if I know I can't have someone and I tell them, the guaranteed rejection will blow my fantasy out of the water. Once it's no longer a possibility, you just can't pretend.

If the time comes where the fantasy is no longer comforting enough to over power my need to say my piece and get closure, I will open my mouth. Otherwise, I just enjoy the sex dreams until I'm bored enough to move on to someone new. Getting bored happens more often for me, I don't get the crushes like you do.

Now if I'm lusting after them, I keep my mouth shut but my subconscious starts seducing them. I can't help myself but to push it. Then if I turn them over to me, well of course I'll give into their advances.

Doesn't matter why I can't have them or who they are. I'm lucky enough to not be attracted to Married people or those in serious relationships. With all others the bets are off and like before my subconscious seems to make the calls.

Fantasies give me a special joy. Now if I know I can't have someone and I tell them, the guaranteed rejection will blow my fantasy out of the water. Once it's no longer a possibility, you just can't pretend.
ahh, see this is exactly me!! my problem, though, is that what ruins my fantasy is finding out the other person is straight! so no matter how much i hide it from them, the second they give me a hint that they like boys, it's over. (and then sometimes i pretend anyway. sometimes i convince myself that even though she's married, she MUST secretly want me...)


Depends person to person. I usually wind up telling the people I like, though it rarely works out. Doesn't go badly either, though.

Personally I don't tell anyone I like them, until I don't anymore... at which point I could care less about their reaction to it...

Which probably would Not be the advice I'd give..

I pretty much never actually tell anyone I want them, but (unless it's a situation where it would be inappropriate, like a boss or something) I do flirt with them and have fun with it. But I always leave it in a semi-joking way to cover my ass if they get suspicious. :)
But then again, I'm also notorious for doing the same thing with friends I don't actually want, (flirting, telling them they are hot, etc, in a joking way) so it's not a sudden change from how I would usually act.

yeah, i do this too, like with boys all the time--joke like i want them when i actually don't. so doing it with girls isn't suspicious at all, and nobody would have a clue!

I keep it to myself usually.

I don't think the way in which i want them would change the answer... i wouldn;t tell someone i have a silly crush on them, or that i love them, if it wasn't reciprocated 9and never would be).

i'm not sure about the reasoning changing thing though... because i am so shit at admitting my feelings, i think that they would have to make the first move.

I originally wrote that who they are didn;t matter... but if it was someone i HAD to see on a daily basis (ie a co-worker), then i would defo not say anything. Or if it was someone who also knew everyone i knew, i wouldnt say anything because i would be terrified they would tell my friends and everyone would secretly laugh at me.

Sometimes, i think the fact that you can't have them is half the fun. like sometimes when you get something, it's a let down. But if you can never have it, you will never be let down.

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