post i made in lesbian:
i know everybody always says that you'll know when you're ready to come out of the closet, and i know what they mean, because now, i'm ready. i'm only out to 2 people, and i want to come out to the right people in the right order with the right circumstances, so it still might be a while until i'm actually out, but when the opportunity arrives, i know i'm ready.
back in october, i was ok with the idea of me being a lesbian. i had been ok with the idea for nearly 4 years, and i still didn't feel 'ready.' i finally decided that i mustn't know what 'ready' felt like, and i decided to come out anyway. it turned out i wasn't ready. i wound up coming out to 2 people, but i messed it up and got scared and tried to run away, and was miserable for weeks. i was worried and scared and i regretted telling them, even though both of them were wonderful and 100% accepting.
since i had already told them, i had no choice but to deal with it, and gradually, i got used to it. now, i wouldn't trade that experience for anything. i think that i'm ready to come out now because i told them, and because i got used to them knowing.
i'm 21 years old, and i just feel like i've wasted a lot of my time, trying to get 'ready' or waiting to be 'ready.' if i hadn't come out before i was ready, i don't know when/if i would ever have felt ready.
so my question is this (and don't get mad; i'm just wondering what everybody thinks):
do you really think it's best that you wait until you're 'ready' to come out? don't you think that at a certain point, it would be better to advise closeted lesbians to forget being 'ready,' take a deep breath and do it, feel awful for a while, and if they make it out alive, they'll never have to worry about being 'ready' again, because they'll be there?
coming out