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my life is one big rumor.
the second i arrived at work today, before i even had time to put away my stuff, amit called me over to the service desk and asked, 'so where'd you sleep last night?'
'in my bed,' i answered.
'with who?'
'with my stuffed snoopy.'
i leave out the part about marie's shirt. i don't mention that when i woke up in the morning, snoopy was on the floor and i was hugging marie's shirt, holding it close to my face. the smell is almost gone, but i'm trying my hardest to enjoy it while it lasts. he didn't ask about that and i didn't tell him.

once i clock in, alyssa asks, 'so what's this i heard about you writing malik a love letter?'
i did. it was a joke. i gave it to rashid to give to him last night, because i didn't work, and they both did. it was obviously a joke, if you read it. alyssa didn't read it, and she thinks i'm crazy.

terrie is here, for not very long, and rashid says that i'm not doing a very good job of completing my list. if i want to do the second half of 'first marie, then terrie,' i'd better start doing something, instead of just standing around talking to him.

alyssa talks about how she sees lust in my eyes every time i talk about jim. rashid tells her that's not right, because i'm bad. alyssa doesn't know what bad is. he doesn't tell her, but she says marie would be upset, and that marie probably slept with me because she wants my disease. rashid says she probably already has every disease you can get. alyssa tells him that's a rude thing to say.

since it's malik's last day, we get malik a cake from the bakery, and malik says i probably 'ate some deli' to get it for him. rashid says it wasn't hard for me, since i'm a bad girl. except, he says, i'd better not tell molly, because she might be jealous.

so, translated, all this means:
i'm gay. (rashid's version)
i'm bisexual. (alyssa's version)
i slept with marie.
i think malik is hot.
i'm in lust with jim.
i ate out tiffany to get a cake for malik.
molly is my girlfriend.
i have aids.
i want terrie.

it's all a joke, sort of... but sort of not. i don't really know what's a joke and what's not. i know what's true (the first and the last statements on that list, and that's all), but i don't know what they know, or what they think they know... they're just having fun, and i'm having fun too, to some extent, but it's getting to be ridiculous.

malik is gone now, so that should end a lot of the rumors, or at least stop new ones from starting. malik is how rashid and i got into talking about 'deli' and 'under the table,' and all that stuff. and malik won't be sexy any more, now that he's gone. with malik gone, rashid and i will be the only ones who know what bad is... except for that i told marie... marie, by the way, went to visit her cousins for the weekend, and i won't work with her again until wednesday. i know better than to be upset by that.

when i get off work, i have to wait a half hour for molly, and i talk to kiera. i get a long pole and take this sign down from the ceiling. putting it back up isn't quite as easy as the big guys make it look... i hit myself in the head with it (or sometimes the pole) at least 5 times, which amuses the hell out of kiera, jorge, malik, and greg. when i finally get it back up, i go over to the service desk. kiera is talking about gymnastics and flexibility. i've never done gymnastics in my life, but i think i'm scrawny enough that i can do things most people can't with my arms and my legs, though i've never really thought about it until now. i start trying to put my leg behind my head. standing up, i can almost do it. i can touch my heel of my left leg to the top of my head while standing on my right leg, but i lose my balance before i can get it behind my head. teena and michelle come out to watch, and scott's there, and molly comes over too. kiera does a back handspring in the middle of the store. i sit on the floor and kiera takes my legs and tucks them back behind my head. teena laughs and says i'm a freak, so in this pretzel position, i dance around and sing rick james: 'super freak, super freak, she's super freaky...' they crack up. kiera tells me to do a backbend, which i can't do, so she helps me, but my arms are sore from holding that sign for however long it took me to put it back up, and i can't figure out how to get out of this position without falling on my head. i end up walking halfway around the front end, upside down, and finally i manage to twist over, onto my side. after the pretzel position, my legs are sore, and after the sign and all that walking around upside down, my arms are sore, so i just collapse and writhe around on the floor for a while. teena laughs so hard she has to run to the bathroom, and the customers who come in and see me squirming and the whole group of them laughing think we're all psycho. then me and kiera start having flexiblity contests, but i keep goofing around and making her laugh so she loses. when molly gets off, kiera tells her that she's lucky she lives with me, because i must be entertaining. molly says i'm movey. kiera asks, 'huh?' and molly says she means i never stop moving. kiera says if she lived with me, she'd invite all her friends over, and they wouldn't even have to get drunk or high, they could just watch me for fun.

so i'm good for entertainment and rumors. this is great, or something... i miss christine.