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today i worked 16 hours total, between the two jobs. accidental overtime at my internship, plus 7 hours at the grocery store. it was not fun. i am very tired. i have been awake for way too long. and i miss christine. i sit there in front of my computer screen trying to concentrate on some program and the next thing i know, visions of christine are dancing in my head... i can't get her out of my mind. you know what the scary part is? i was at work today (grocery store), and we have one of those day by day calandars, and on each day it has how old you have to be to buy alcohol or tobacco products. THAT reminded me of christine. becuase there is one of those at big bear too. and one time when i was looking at christine, and then got worried that i was staring, i turned away and read that day by day calandar, the whole day, and then i flipped and read the next day, and i read like 4 or 5 days waiting for her to finish getting whatever for me. when people buy oranges, it reminds me of christine juggling them. when i see carrots, i remember the time i asked her the number for them becuase i figured they wouldnt be on the small cheat sheet, and then they were. she is everywhere. i miss the 5 times she touched me. i miss talking to her. i even miss sitting in silence in the break room with her, becuase at least she was there. i am torturing myself. no more, loser, stop.

in other news:
anna is hot. i talked to her a little today. she now calls me psycho girl, becuase i 'move too much' and 'have no attention span.' she says it's like i'm always on some sort of sugar high. i told her i guess that's just me. and jim asked her if she took me on breaks with her and she shrugged and said brian usually did. jim scolded her and said she should becuase he figured she'd be playing the big sister role. so next break time, she says in a very sarcastic voice, 'hey lil sis, you ready for break?' which makes me laugh and wish she was christine. it all goes back to christine...

holly came in to the store twice today. things were back to normal. she comes over to me the first time, punches me lightly in the arm, and says 'hey loser, whats up?' i roll my eyes and say sarcastically 'you again? you've got no right to make fun of me for being here too much!' she rolls her eyes and says 'hey whatever, you were in here twice yesterday!' i laugh and tell her my 2 very good reasons and she just teases yeah sure. that's typical holly and me interaction. making fun of each other. but not mean. the whole time, you can tell we're just kidding. the second time, she was in with some guy, and i spotted her and called out 'hey, you win now!' she's used to me not saying quite what i mean, but she's not so good with translating... she asks what i mean, and i tell her that's twice today for her, and since she's here during the week, she's gotta be here more than me. the guy she's with laughs at her and tells her it does seem like she's here a lot. im on the schedule with her for next saturday. i used to like working with her becuase we had fun. hopefully, it'll be like that again. i think everything's ok.

i must sleep now. next weekend is columbus and i hope i hope i hope christine... i'm keeping all my fingers crossed...