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what the fuck????
stupidfool
ok, so i'm gay, right?

if i'm gay, why does it feel like i'm getting a crush on a boy????

a man, at that. a gay man. and he's not even ultra-flaming, like the kind of gay boy that usually makes me say, 'awww, he's so cute...' but stacy copeland... yeah, that's the man. he's just this semi-masculine man who's good at bowling and is nice and when i left the bowling alley, i couldn't stop wishing that i had talked to him more, or smiled at him more, and i couldn't stop analyzing practically every time i've ever interacted with him, even last week, and why the fuck would i be thinking like that about a man??? i thought i was gay! this isn't supposed to happen to gay girls! somebody please tell me i'm gay... tell me i didn't go through that entire process of coming out and meeting lesbians so that i could fall for a gay man in his mid 30s...

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maybe he was just nice. Although I see there's another entry about this, so maybe I should read that one first...

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