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last friday
friday, i woke up, and immediately, everything from last night came rushing back to me. i was immediately upset and depressed...

i went to bob evans. i was depressed, and trying too hard to get courtney to talk to me, because i knew that she could fix it... only i started to feel like i was annoying her, because she was being kind of rude to me. (i realize, now, that courtney gets in these moods where she's really anti-social and rude to everybody. courtney is a moody person. but i always forget to think it through, and i always take it personally.)

we both came in at 8. we were both on the same side. technically, i have 9 days more seniority than her, although she claims that she's worked there longer than i have (she's probably right. i got hired, and then didn't start my training for another week or two.) when they went to cut the next person off, she decided it should be her. i was perfectly willing to let her go first, and had even assumed that she would be going first, but when i thought about it, i realized that it really wasn't fair... if she had asked me if i minded, i wouldn't have cared, but she didn't even ask. just to be difficult, i said, sort of jokingly, 'hmmm... i think i should get to leave. we came in at the same time, and i do have 9 days more seniority than you.'
'ok, fine,' she snapped, 'you can leave, and i'll stay on. i don't care.'
'i was just kidding,' i tell her, 'you can leave.'
'no. leave,' she said.
'no, i haven't even started my out. i'll still be here for a while,' i told her, 'you can leave.'
'i'll stay. you go. i've already done your out, if you're leaving now.'
'well then i'd do yours,' i said, 'and i'd still have to be here.'
she responded by taking a table (which she wouldn't have done, if she was leaving).
then i was frustrated, because i felt like she was mad at me, and i hadn't meant for her to stay, at all. i refused to be cut, too. i continued to work, and to do my out, until finally they cut zak down to a 1, and courtney and i were both cut. then we both put in an order for food, and we both ate back in the break room. yvette came in, after a bit, and she sat with us, too.

kevin and i had decided, a while ago, that he was going to come over tonight and play video games with me. courtney had said, a few nights ago, that she and lily were going to go watch that new dancing movie, with j-lo, tonight.

i get all weird. i tell yvette, 'kevin's coming over tonight, if you want to come over.'
we discuss it for a while, and i keep saying stupid stuff, like, 'we're having a party, and courtney's not going,' or, 'we'll all have fun, without courtney,' and i keep saying, a million different ways, how courtney isn't going to be there. i don't know why the fuck i keep bringing it up. do i want courtney to change her mind? do i want courtney to tell me that i'm wrong? do i want courtney to be jealous, that we're all going to have such fun, in her house, without her? i say it so many times that it probably sounds really weird, to everybody involved... but courtney is sitting right there, not saying anything about it.
anyway, yvette says she'll call me. courtney leaves. a little bit later, i leave, too.

i get home, and courtney is complaining about all the stuff that she has to do, but doesn't want to do. this is all courtney ever does--complain about the things that she has to do. she never wants to shower. she never wants to get ready. she never wants to do laundry. she never wants to drive anywhere. half the time, she'll make plans with people, and then ditch them. or she'll say, for days, that she's doing laundry with her day off, but when her day off rolls around, she doesn't do it.

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(unrelated to entry)

meatsauce is liz's new nickame...well not really that new but I guess I never called her that in my journal before (it's not related to the food system or due to any interesting story, she was just randomly saying one day how meatsauce would be a cool nickname so I was like "ok, I'll call you meatsauce then!" And then she was like no, not for me, for like some beefy guy or something but I totally thought it was an awesome name for her so it stuck.) Which is good because she needed a new nickname since we can't call her #16 anymore since she got mad. [Which is why I'm writing this in your journal instead of in reply to that comment, since she might actually start reading my journal and I don't want her to get mad about the #16 thing again].

and jenna's ass...is apparently smaller than it used to be, but still big. And I swear I really don't talk about her ass on a regular basis or anything but that was really the first thing liz said to me on the phone and I thought it was pretty hilarious. Although in liz's defense, I guess she really couldn't avoid jenna's ass since jenna was playing Frank-N-Furter in Rocky Horror and according to liz "it was sticking out everywhere!"
And no jenna can't read my journal anymore but I didn't want to write that in there bc I didn't want people who know her reading it and thinking I am an ass (pun not originally intended...but it is kinda funny, heh). I feel like some kind of wannabe ghetto thug rapper talking about girls asses or something. lol.

Re: (unrelated to entry)

ohhhh, i LIKE #16! that was better than meatsauce...

when did she find out and get mad about the #16 thing? did i miss that, or did you just not write about it??

Re: (unrelated to entry)

it was a long time ago, I probably didn't write about it but I don't remember...it was sometime towards the end of the last school year, sarah, jo, #16 and I were going to dinner at Friday's and sarah I and mentioned something about #16...and we said something to #16 like...we've been calling you #16 this whole time and you never noticed. I figured if she made us tell her the reason, she would think it was funny, or an honor, or something, to be on the list of 27 bitches and hos, but I was still a little scared to tell her just in case. But sarah was finally like "just tell her!" so I told her...and she got SOOOO pissed it wasn't even funny. Like...she was offended that we considered her a bitch or a ho, even though it was clearly a joke, and I was really worried that she would be seriously mad at me...but then luckily the subject just got dropped and it simply wasn't discussed again, and we kind of stopped calling her #16. Sometimes some of us would still do it in private, but we had to be really careful from that point...since before if she heard us say #16 she wouldn't know what we were talking about, but now she would...and we never meant it to be mean or anything so it kind of took the fun away...and then it basically kind of dwindled away.

ok, now reading the entry I'm just a bit confused...why does the text under the "friday night ruled" cut just talk about courtney complaining? did you get cut off? is there more coming? I hope so, bc if that's really why it ruled, that's a little sad... :-p

Friday night ruled for me too- my first night at a trashy country bar! LOL my friends had to DRAG me in there- Ill post all about it. I went with my bi friend Angela so we could dance (Eddie knows about me, he doesn't mind) and plus its better than dancing alone- but the name of the place was terrible- COOTER BROWNS. LOLOL.

haha, cooter browns is a really funny name... it sort of sounds like a country strip joint or something!

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