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stupidfool
i am doing homework. well, i'm not. but i was. from about midnight until now, molly and i have been documenting and writing up everything. molly is taking a one-hour nap. i am supposed to be still working. but i need a break. this'll be real quick, so i can go back to homework.

taysha called off work today. so did tisha and sara, which is why they called me and marie in. marie ran one register in front of me. she kept being weird... like when we had no customers, she would come stand right in front of me, and let her hair down all slow and put it back up, and then toss her hair back and walk off. i didn't care. i watched terrie because she was hot, and prudy wasn't here, so terrie actually talked to me today, about pizza and vegetables and cussing at customers.

then terrie sent marie and me on break at the same time. i was sitting alone in the break room on the back of a chair, with my feet where your butt's supposed to go (because the butt spot was dirty). she came in and went to use the phone, but i guess nobody answered, and when she hung up, she pounded the phone down a few times. i remarked, 'i don't think that's going to help any.'
she smiled and said, 'i know, but it makes me feel better.'
then she asked if i was on break, and when i said i was, she said, 'let's go outside. it's nice. come on, come outside with me.'
so i did. on our way outside, she bought some of those spicy chip-type things and a bottled water. she asked if i liked the chips, and i said no. she asked if i had ever tried them, and i said no. she laughed at me and said i shouldn't say that before i try things... but i know i don't like spicy stuff...
outside, it was dark but very nice. we sat on the bench and she took over talking, because my 7-year old is the only version of me that knows how to talk to her, and it never has anything to say on its own. it needs prompted. she asked if i was going home again this summer, or if i was staying here. my 7-year-old told her i was probably staying. she said, 'good. i missed you last summer.'
i said, 'i missed the it all too,' because hi, i'm stupid.
she looked at me and said in a fake-sad voice, 'aww, you mean you didn't miss me??'
i answered, 'no, i missed you. everything.'
she smiled in satisfaction. then we talked about my internship a little, and then we talked about why i haven't gotten a raise (it's because i went home for the summer, i discovered).
then she told me to try a chip. i said no. she said i had to. i said no. she said if i didn't, she'd make me eat a raw green bean from produce. i said, 'better that then one of those icky things,' and motioned to her chips.
she said, 'ok, come on,' and got up and walked inside, so i followed her, asking, 'wait, you're not really going to make me eat one, are you?' she said she was.
we went over to produce, and stood over the green beans, so close that when she leaned over to get a green bean, her sleeve brushed against my arm, and i wanted her. i don't care if she's a minger. i don't care if i don't like her. it feels good when she touches me. i want her. and when you stare long enough, everything that looks bad about her starts to look good. i want her. she got one and broke off the ends and handed me the middle and said, 'eat it.'
i listen well. i protested a little, but she said i had to eat it, so i did. it was disgusting. i made a face that made her laugh, and then we went back over to clock in, and the whole way over, i made faces and 'blech' noises, because it was nasty and i was 7. eliza laughed.
we went up to get drawers and amit was there, and i told him that i ate a raw green bean, and marie prompted, 'tell him how much you liked it!'
my 7-year-old had a reaction that made them laugh for a long time. then, for the rest of the night, amit was teasing me about green beans, and trying to get me to eat one again, so he could see. and somehow terrie found out something, because she asked if i liked green beans about 10 times. she said she agreed, and she only liked them cooked, with those french onion things.

i went on my last break the same time marie went home for the day. i was sitting alone on the back of a different chair (all the seats are dirty), eating part of a candy bar. she came in, eating the leftovers from her bag of chips. she said something about green beans, and then started telling me to try a chip again. i said no, and took a bite of chocolate. she shoved a chip in my face. i batted her hand away, and while it was gone, i took another bite of my candy. she took a chip, and stood between my legs, leaning into me, and stuffed the chip in my face, but i knocked it to the ground. she was laughing and i was probably grinning too because having her lean against me felt good, so how could i be upset? she tried again, and this time, she ground it past my lips and against my teeth, and it was far enough into my mouth that i didn't know what to do but make an awful face, chew it, and swallow. i squirmed all over the place and somehow wound up sitting on the floor, saying 'ewwwwwwwwww yuck,' while she laughed at me. i got up and ran to the drinking fountain, and she chased after me, calling, 'loser, where are you going? come back!' after i got a drink, i did, and went over to my stuff to get some more candy to get rid of the taste. she was in the way, getting her stuff, so i waited. then when i went to get candy, she said 'aww, lemme have some.'
i told her, 'dude, you made me eat two yucky things, and now you want me to give you something good? yeah, right! here, i have something for you to eat,' and i took a squeeze bottle of lotion and opened the top and chased after her, trying (but not real hard, because i'd never actually do it) to squirt the lotion into her mouth. she grabbed my arms, and we wrestled for the lotion for a minute, and wound up squirting it all over the break room. then she ran away, escaping from my lotion, and she went home. and i cleaned up the lotion and i want her. i think i'm stupid, but i don't care. i want her to wrestle me for lotion a while longer. i want her to lean against my legs and shove more chips into my mouth. and then when she's done, i want her to lean against my legs and shove her tongue into my mouth, and then wrap her arms around me, and then our bodies would press together...

christine didn't come.

amit found a stuffed animal, and spent all night throwing it at me, and laughing at my reactions. i threw it back at him and he was concentrating on me, making faces, and ducking, and ignoring self-check. terrie told him to stop flirting. i felt dumb.

i'm going back to homework now. i might not sleep tonight...

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there is no way on any continent of hell that you could ever convince me that she doesn't want you. She was flirting so hard and throwing inuendos around like that lotion splashing across the break room. Alas I didn't have a chance to think of the plot today it was a little hectic and I was pisse dat EJ most of the day for the shit that happened yesterday.

I will make up a "lesson" tomorrow, if Marie hasn't jumped you already.


~Jay~

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